Clarke Drinks at Quay

Clarke Drinks At Quay

“Lieutenant-General Sir Andrew Clarke was a British soldier and the second governor of the Straits Settlements. He is known for signing the Pangkor Treaty in 1874, giving the British indirect rule over the Malay States. With Chinese and European merchant support, Clarke successfully enforced a check on the abuse of coolies that same year.”

• Adapted from NLB’s Singapore Infopedia 

…

It is nights like these where we live, Sir. It is – with that Asahi in your hand (do you like it?) and Tiger beer tower (I don’t like Tiger but twas’ the cheapest,) – with that Pina Colada (and getting caught in the rain) – friends like these, windy breezes like these, pre-games like these, nights like these, Sir, we come to honour your name. 

What is a “kuway” anyway ? 

“Key,” you say ? A bit stupid if you ask me. “Klark-e Kuway…”

It is nights like these where we drink ourselves silly and have reunions and vomit laden Grabs and midnight McDonalds after Zouk and for a briefest moment in clarity we find ourselves in total synchronisation with the night … no we don’t see stars, we’re too egotistical for that, we make our own stars, our own glimmer from every bartend …

Tell me again, your favourite bar story ! What treaty ?! Oh you colonial …

Sir, did you ever meet Raffles ? ! What do you mean no ?

It is nights like these, where I imagine we’re still a British colony – (for it isn’t hard to imagine, what with all the patronage here) – and we are sharing the bounties of the kingdom, the empire, the crown and the masters in our hops and ferments, opium-laced cigarettes, women of the night and rickshaw pullers ferrying Victorians. Where I hide from triads looking to put my head on a stick – and colonials looking to make an example of me …

Sir, why is it pronounced “left - tennant” and not “liu - tennant” like the Americans ?

Your runway child has better pronunciation than her mother , I fear !  

It is nights like these where we live, Sir, it is – with your legacy in your hand (did you like it?) and a huge gunboat – with the uncivilised world clashing with the civilised, the cultured with the uncultured, the naked bodies on dingies against those on big sails and steam, and fire in your pocket, gold in your mouth – Sir, this is where I can become uncivilised again (within reason) and think to myself this river still does bring me life – winding through … ah you get the punchline …

Hey everyone ! This man’s name is on the signs !

Drinks are on him tonight ! ! 

20 November 2025